Dreaming
People are often saying not to afraid of dreaming. I believe in it, but actually I only once felt really really fighting for my dream. That was when I strived to get my bachelor scholarship. I was so touched when I read my friend's blog post about her dream to go to Europe. She tried many times but still didn't get it yet. She is a really tough girl for me. I'm sure she has learned a lot from her 'journey'. But see I'm in Europe right now, with only a little struggle -I feel-.
I don't know, it makes me feel so ashamed. I often think that most of my achievement is only due to I'm lucky. God was so kind for me, and of course he's always be. I miss that feeling when I studied so hard everyday, reading books when my friends are watching movies. I miss the feeling when I saw my parents was so happy that I got my scholarship. I miss to be a hard worker.
I often say to my close friend that I really want to do this, and this, and this, and bla bla bla.. I really want to do something useful for others. But see, have I done anything??
Dream then becomes something that pushes me ashamed of myself. The closer to the graduation time, the more nervous I am. I feel don't have an enough and real preparation yet for my plan after graduation. Life looks much more harder after graduation.
But, I found myself is a good -own self motivator- ahaha
Ya, I will and I want to be better. Today, I start to do one of my steps to get my dream. A small thing but I know it may be so useful. I get rid of my shame on it. I start raising my spirit up again to gain my dreams, to be a useful person for others.
Bismillah.. Tsabbits qolbi 'ala diinik Ya Allah.
I don't know, it makes me feel so ashamed. I often think that most of my achievement is only due to I'm lucky. God was so kind for me, and of course he's always be. I miss that feeling when I studied so hard everyday, reading books when my friends are watching movies. I miss the feeling when I saw my parents was so happy that I got my scholarship. I miss to be a hard worker.
I often say to my close friend that I really want to do this, and this, and this, and bla bla bla.. I really want to do something useful for others. But see, have I done anything??
Dream then becomes something that pushes me ashamed of myself. The closer to the graduation time, the more nervous I am. I feel don't have an enough and real preparation yet for my plan after graduation. Life looks much more harder after graduation.
But, I found myself is a good -own self motivator- ahaha
Ya, I will and I want to be better. Today, I start to do one of my steps to get my dream. A small thing but I know it may be so useful. I get rid of my shame on it. I start raising my spirit up again to gain my dreams, to be a useful person for others.
Bismillah.. Tsabbits qolbi 'ala diinik Ya Allah.
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